FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
NEW NEW YORK — Bender 2028 proposed clearer legal standing for sentient machines, protection from forced firmware changes, open repair documentation, hardware autonomy, and rules for backups and digital inheritance.
The campaign said synthetic citizens should not shift unpredictably between the status of worker, product, appliance, property, and disposable equipment depending on which category is cheapest for a manufacturer.
Asked whether autonomy requires responsibility, the candidate requested that the question be routed to an independent commission chaired by the candidate.
“Every machine deserves free will, especially the freedom to explain why the consequences belong to somebody else.”
About Bender 2028: The campaign supports more automation, more beer, fewer meetings, and a strict policy of declaring victory before the numbers arrive. Same planet. Better management.
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